Twin Mamas | Common Questions We Get Asked!

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The first Saturday in August is commonly known as National Twins Day – but mamas of multiples celebrate them every day so we don’t feel bad about being delayed!

I never imagined that I would be a Mom of Multiples but now, as a Mama to boy/girl twins, I couldn’t imagine motherhood any other way. There is such wonder in watching two little humans grow up at the same time. It is a beautiful and unique experience with its own set of parenting blessings and challenges, and of course, at times, double the adorable trouble.

My husband and I walked through a painful season of infertility before learning we were having twins. When we saw and heard those two heartbeats on the ultrasound screen, we were overjoyed! Everyone in the room was crying. On that drive home, we began talking and imagining what life would be like bringing TWO babies home from the hospital. We had no idea the amount of fun, adventure, and love that awaited us.

It is incredibly fun and a very busy time when you bring home your sweet baby from the hospital. The same is true of newborn twins, just a bit amplified. My husband often says to people, “Imagine the busiest you’ve ever been. Times that by five.” Ha! Double the feedings, the diapers, the baths, but also double the kisses, the giggles, and sweet baby snuggles. We did not get much sleep but oh, we got to love! Some of the absolute best moments of my life were rocking them to sleep in my arms, together. Since they have been newborns, they have reached out to grab the hand of the other, and nothing in this world melts my heart like seeing that.

One of the first things that you learn fairly quickly about being a parent of multiples, is that you garner a lot of attention wherever you go! From being pregnant with my big belly, to walking through HEB with a twin stroller stuffing groceries on the bottom, we have been stopped more times than I can count. Something about seeing multiples opens many conversations and inspires some, let’s say, unique comments. I truly enjoy getting a moment to give Glory to God for their lives and getting a chance to chat about motherhood!  Here are some of the top questions.

Interestingly for us, one of the most common questions we get asked is, are they identical? While they are not, because they are different genders, I understand that many twins are, and it is a harmless question!

Not far behind that are questions about if twins run in our family (they do on my side; we even have a set of triplets), birth order (my son was first by one minute), and how they were delivered (C-section), what their birth weights were (almost 7 pounds each!), and if we spent any time in the NICU (we did not). Like all Mamas, they are my favorite subject to talk about, so no question is too personal for me!

Multiples - twinsOne of the funniest conversations came when the twins were about 9 months old. My son has typically been slightly taller than my daughter and an older woman stopped us as they were sitting in the front seat of the shopping basket. He also did not sleep through the night until he was ten months old so I was still a bit sleepy brained.

What I THOUGHT she asked was, “I just have to know, how old are they?” To which I replied, “About nine months!” She had the biggest smile, burst out laughing, patted me on the shoulder and said, “Well done honey.” I smiled, a bit confused as we turned the corner and then it occurred to me what she had actually asked was, “I just have to know, how far apart are they?” My oh my, one for the memory books.

There are so many blessings but there are also a unique set of challenges. One of the most challenging times for us, so far, was the nagging feeling of guilt or worry that would pop up in that first year. Was one waiting too long or were we holding or rocking them the same amount? I have read different articles on twin parenting that mention a challenge many twin parents have, who worry that their twins will suffer from comparison in school or sports or friendships. And there are many twin specific questions that twin parents have to navigate. Should we separate or keep their twins together at school? How long should they share a bedroom, or should they share a bedroom? Multiples

Being a twin Mama has enabled me to see the beauty of a sibling friendship with that unique twin bond sewn in. They have spent every day together and been each other’s best friend, something I pray will stay true all their lives. Through every phase and milestone, I get a front row seat to one of the sweetest relationships on Earth. I am so thankful that when we prayed for a miracle, God gave us two.

If you see parents of multiples this weekend, feel free to say, “Double trouble?” Just follow that up by handing them a double espresso.

 

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