I’m a type A person, so I LOVE planning. Schedules, routines, and planners are my jam. But if you are reading this, you’re probably a mother, and you’ve probably had a plan or two fall through. Maybe you thought you could handle 3 kids on a grocery shopping trip, but the 2.5 year old isn’t quite as potty trained as you thought. Maybe you’ve thought to yourself, “we don’t have to be at the airport that early, let’s go to a trampoline park”. (no, that one’s just me? Oh well, it’s still one of my favorite memories with my kiddos and I don’t regret it.)
Kids have a way of humbling us as parents, am I right?
So, what do you do when all the planning you do falls short of perfect (as it so often does)? Let me point something out, mama: your littles are watching. And research is showing that the most important trait for a child to have to be successful is persistence. Kids who show high levels of persistence perform better not only in school and sports, but have more successful careers and marriages.
When your child does something well, it is best to praise their determination, their focus, and their hard work. Instead of praising outcomes, praise the process that got them there.
So, back to the question. When you plan something, and it falls short, what do you do? Praise your process. Develop persistence in yourself as an example to your ever-observant children. Mamas need to give themselves grace as much as they give it away to others.
It’s also so important to celebrate the little victories. Maybe you didn’t accomplish anything on your to-do list, but you DID switch the laundry from the washer to the dryer. You DID feed a few mouths today. You DID wake up. That is enough. Let go of crazy expectations.
I love to plan, and just because it doesn’t always work out, my personality isn’t going to change. However, I control my attitude when it doesn’t go perfectly. Two little boys are looking at mama, watching how she handles obstacles; I want them to see a strong woman who conquers bumps in the road but gives herself grace when it’s hard.
Happy planning, mama, but more importantly: happy stumbling. You got this!